Thursday, March 22, 2012

BBC (Byzantine Broadcasting Corporation) World News: Spring 1872 Vol 1

 Italy Gets Time Changes Mixed Up

Benito Spartacus in a statement to our intrepid reporter Maximus Guillibus has confirmed that his government got things totally wrong when jump-off times for Italian military moves went awry.

Quoting Benito he stated that “Weesa thought it wasa ‘Spring Back anna Falla Forward’. De trains dey nona longer running on time ana de army and de navy dey not moving at all.”

Unconfirmed reports state that special teachers have been dispatched to all Italian schools to teach the mantra “Spring Forward-Fall Back”. Meanwhile Guido ‘the Enforcer’ has been sent to command units of the Regia Marina and the Esercito Italiano for a little re-education exercise on daylight savings time. It is rumoured  baseball bats are involved.
 Satellite Images Reveal the True State of Military Moves in Europe

Recently received satellite images from Sat Nav I indicate the true state of affairs in Europe. 

 The Germans, Russians. Austrian-Hungarians, French, Romans, Italians and English are at a loss to explain this mess. Distrust of the Overseer runs rampant. The Overseer suspects hacking of the Sat Nav I Satellite by sources unnamed..  Adolphe Thiers denies all knowledge of claims that there have been any cyber attacks by the French Republic.

 Tsar Alexander Liberates Sweden to Ensure Product Safety

Concerned over recent declining quality and safety with Volvo cars Tsar Alexander has been forced  to occupy Volvo care works in Malmo. His Imperial Majesty has also expressed fears over the quality of Saab products.

In an exclusive statement to our reporter , Maximus Guillibus, he stated: “It is obvious that the capitalist swine and the running dogs of imperialism have no regard to the safety of the freedom loving proletariat peoples of the world. Good socialist work ethics will be introduced in our massive re-organization of Swedish industry,”

La République Finally Gets it Right
In a decisive move units of the Marine Nationale finally got into gear and have occupied Spain.
It is reported that Tapas Bars will be replaced by Cafes. It is also rumoured that a Spanish guerilla movement is emerging supported by the Black Shirts in Italy.
Portuguese Tapas Bar owners are also extremely nervous.
Meanwhile unconfirmed reports state that Britain and France are holding high level talks over perceived Nazi.....errr that should be EU inclusion of the Low Countries has failed to secure all good beer supplies.
Swimming lessons for the French Army continue. 
Secret  Society Rumored to Be Re-Emerging 

Eastern Roman intelligence sources suggest that a long thought dead clandestine society has re-emerged after a 30 year hiatus. Sources have revealed the following icon:

Anyone who has knowledge of this obscure symbol are urged to contact the Overseer. 

T-Shirts of the famed Atlantic Simulations Society will be available for sale. Total cost including taxes is $20.70 per shirt.

Purchasing details are to be arranged.

Wilkileaks: In a confidential email released by a source within the Office of the Overseer, the following concerns were  noted:

"I will remind all members that the constitution of the Atlantic Simulations Society forbid the use of the word ass or the acronym A.S.S. to refer to the society. However, in some cases, the members may be referred to as asses."

Britain Prevents German Beer Monopoly
 In a brilliant move elements of the British Army and the Royal Navy thwarted German attempts to place a stranglehold on beer supplies in Europe.
 In a national statement the Prime Minister Lord Stanley stated “Thank goodness we will still have Carlsberg at a reasonable price. Never have so few owed so much to so many.”
 It is believed from unconfirmed sources that the British and French are conducting high level bi-lateral talks on preserving good beer supplies.

Austria-Hungary Saves Failing  Greek Economy
Units of the the Kaiserliche und Königliche Kriegsmarine entered Athens early last week in a valiant attempt to rescue a nation drowning in debt. With promises of a new currency and death to all speculators Kaiser Franz-Jospeh has brought promises of a new era for all olive growers and Taverna owners in the blighted country.
Deustchland Uber Alles (Almost)

Units of the 1ST Guards Infantry Brigade, including  the Kaiser Alexander Grenadiers and the 3rd Guard Grenadier Regiment-Elisabeth....NO, NO, NO THAT SHOULD BE.....German EU Bureaucrats and German central bankers have successfully incorporated Holland and Belgium into  Greater Germany NO, NO, NO.....that should be the European Economic Community.
The recent plebiscite in Denmark with rumours of British vote fixing backed up by the Royal Navy and British Army met German aims up with a resounding NO. Long live the freedom loving Danes.
Eastern Roman Empire Waits

Recent European developments have been foreseen by Imperator Justininan and as a result he has taken “a wait and see what happens attitude” while Bulgaria is assimilated into the eastern Roman Empire.

Recent diplomatic conversations with Germany, Italy and Russia indicates that the “game is a foot”.


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